Elves vs. Giants

I recently packed up my stuff and moved into the gym owned my new coach. My coach is gruff old drunken dwarf named Tobias. Tobias in his prime was the masked wrestler known simply as The Dynamite Dwarf. With his killer finishing move called The Dynamite Kick, he could beat any giant in the land. Alongside my adoptive father, Hawk, Tobias was one of my heroes growing up here in Giant City. One thing I have in common with my coach Tobias is that I ain’t all that tall. In fact, I’m an elf living in a literal land of giants. Giant City is hidden atop an icy mountain peak that reaches up to the sky and is the home to all giants in the land. Giant City is ruled by The Giant King, a cocky son of a gun who holds a yearly fighting tournament that is meant to show off his strength and give his subjects hope. No one, not even Tobias in his prime, can beat The Giant King in a fight. But I’ll be the one to do it. My name is Kyle and I’m someone that you really don’t want to mess with. As an elf living in a land of giants, there is one thing you learn how to be quick. And that is to be tough, because being a short guy in a city where everyone is ten feet tall isn’t the greatest. I was bullied growing up because of my short size. Yet, I showed them who was boss, because I beat up those bullies and won every time. I got tough quick and became an adult even quicker. Like I said, I was raised by Hawk who is the most talented thief that I ever knew. And before I started training to become a professional wrestler, I was a thief and was a member of my dad Hawk’s gang. Hawk isn’t my biological father, in fact, I never knew my real old man, nor have I ever seen another elf before in my life. But to me, Hawk is my old man and he’s in trouble. Hawk was arrested by The Giant King’s royal guard, and he’s currently locked away in the dungeon inside The Giant King’s castle. Hawk finally got caught stealing for the first time in his life. Besides trying to be the first one to ever defeat The Giant King, the only reason I’m entering this tournament is to free Hawk. Whoever wins the entire tournament gets one wish granted and my wish is to free my old man. I’ve been training with Tobias for about four months with the tournament only a day away. Tobias’s gym is a cool place, I room with him there alongside his pet wolf Skeet and his robot bodyguard Vanessa. If Hawk was like my father, Tobias is like my drunk uncle, Skeet is like my little brother, and Vanessa is like my sister. Except, for some reason, I can’t confirm or deny it, but I think Vanessa has a crush on me. Which is sad, because I’m an elf and she’s a robot, so it’ll never be, even if I felt the same way about her. In fact, Vanessa used to be a robot guard soldier for The Giant King’s royal guard until she broke down and Tobais found her in the dump. Tobias reprogramed her and now she’s like the daughter he never had. 

Anyway, back in the present day I was working on improving my punch and punching the punching bag like it owed me money. Tobias was asleep in chair with Skeet standing guard. Vanessa was cheering me on, her voice was kind of cute, even though she’s a robot, her voice sounds human. After punching that bag for hours, Vanessa handed me some water and pat me on the back. “You’re definitely going to slay some giants, Kyle,” she said. Note that she didn’t say slay The Giant King, because I forgot to mention that Vanessa also is fighting in the tournament too. I doubt Vanessa could beat The Giant King, but hey, she has a wish too. Yet she’s keeping it a secret from me. As I sat down for a sec to drink some water, Skeet started growling and Vanessa’s alarms went haywire. Vanessa’s arm transformed into a robot laser sword as she pointed at a mysterious young woman wearing a brown hood. “Halt, who goes there?” cried Vanessa. The mysterious young woman lowered her hood to reveal she was an elf like me. In fact, she looked a little too much like me, she looked like my twin or something. She held out her hand and cried “Don’t be afraid your highness. I mean you no harm,”. Tobias finally woke up from his drunken nap and sobered up quick. Tobias kneeled faster than you could say Johnny Quickbody and he yelled at me to kneel too. I asked why should I kneel to this random lady? Tobias coughed and shouted at me, “Because that’s Princess Emma stupid! She’s a member of the Elf Kingdom royal family,”. Elf Kingdom, I never heard of such of place. Why should I care about this Princess Emma of the Elf Kingdom. Well, Princess Emma made me figure out why I should care about the Elf Kingdom. Not only will the Elf Kingdom be at war with Giant City unless she marries The Giant King, but Princess Emma claims that I am her long-lost brother. What a crock, I ain’t a prince. “But you are, you must believe. I can’t stay here for too long. His men will find me. Meet me at this location and we’ll discuss your birthright,” said Princess Emma as she handed me an address to a nearby pub. Princess Emma put her hood back up and fled quicker than she arrived. I told Tobias she was probably just nuts and that we should continue our training. But Tobias and Vanessa just stood there not saying a word. I never ended up not meeting Princess Emma at that pub, and I just resumed my day like that had never happened. Finally, the day of the tournament arrived and all my training by Tobais the Dynamite Dwarf was worth it. The Giant King and Princess Emma watched me beat opponent after opponent. I toppled giants like it was nothing. Tobias has his Dynamite Kick while I had my Dragon Punch. Everything went smoothly until it was time to fight Vanessa. Just because I thought of Vanessa as a sister didn’t mean I would go easy on her. But I didn’t count Vanessa out either, because she did just as much training as me. Oddly enough, Vanessa and I were the final two fighters in the tournament with the winner facing The Giant King himself. Vanessa, being a former member of The Giant King’s royal guard was quite a giant herself. The bell rang and we went brawling. We were evenly matched as we fought nearly to death. I cared about Vanessa, but I cared about my old man Hawk more. I needed to win this whole tournament to free my old man. Midway through the fight, something funny happened. When I twisted Vanessa’s arm, she bled. My mind was blown and so was the crowd. That was the only time that the crowd was on my side too. For the first time that I ever heard Vanessa moan in pain. I asked how can you feel pain because you’re just a robot, right? Vanessa grabbed me and lifted me up in the air. As she held me in the air, she whispered in my ear with a tear, “I’m not a robot Kyle. I’m a cyborg, which means I’m half-giant and half-robot,”. Before Vanessa could do the finishing blow, Tobias pulled out a remote control and Vanessa dropped me. She stood still and couldn’t move which left her open to my finishing move The Dragon Punch. But I didn’t want to do it, but I did it anyway. I knocked Vanessa out cold, and she flew out of the ring. Then I started crying, because it dawned on me. I really was in love with Vanessa, and it was at that moment she wasn’t just a friend, she felt like something more. 

Yet, I couldn’t stop because after I knocked Vanessa out, The Giant King made his grand entrance to the ring. The Giant King, where most giants were ten feet tall, he was at least twenty. The Giant King got the biggest applause ever from the crowd who happened to be his loyal subjects. Finally, the match I wanted my whole life, me vs. The Giant King. A nugget of a elf vs. a twenty-foot giant. A king vs. a prince, in the main event. The Giant King attempted his first punch, but I dodged it. I kicked him, but The Giant King felt nothing. The Giant King suddenly kicked me in the gut, and I went flying. I almost was out for the count, but deep down I wasn’t. I couldn’t lose this fight, not for me, not for Hawk, not for Tobias, and especially not for Vanessa. I got back up and The Giant King punched me back down. Only every time he tried to knock me out, I just got up even stronger. Finally, the crowd switched sides and started cheering my name. All throughout the arena I heard my name being cheered. Then with every next move I made, the crowd shouted Kyle even more. As our match went on, The Giant King grew more tired. Then, I knew this was it, I had an opening to do my finishing move The Dragon Punch underneath his big fat ugly warty chin. And bang, I did it, I knocked out The Giant King. He fell with the loudest thud I ever did hear. After The Giant King was out like a light, I pinned him. The referee couldn’t count fast enough. It happened, I won, I defeated The Giant King. And the rest is history because I just made history. At first, I was going to wish to free Hawk, but my heart had another wish. So instead, I wish that Vanessa could become real again. All The Giant King’s horses and all The Giant King’s men finally made Vanessa one hundred percent giant again. After I won the tournament, things were looking up for me. Princess Emma was right, I was indeed her brother and as much as I hate to admit, I am a prince. Shockingly, Vanessa is The Giant King’s long-lost daughter which makes her a princess. So, my sister didn’t have to marry The Giant King to prevent a war, but I married Princess Vanessa instead. Of course I freed the man who raised me. Hawk got a full pardon by me. With Princess Emma, Vanessa, and I having to head back to my kingdom, I said my goodbyes to Hawk and Tobais. Hawk resumed running his gang and eventually got arrested again. There’s only so many times I could bail my old man out, eventually I had to stop because I knew Hawk, he never learned. As for Tobais and Skeet, they’re doing just fine. After all, Tobais is busy training more future champions at his gym. Because when you were the coach of the elf who defeated The Giant King, you bet you got a lot of hopeful fighters at your beckon call. And I would say we all lived happily ever after, but what do you think this is, a fairy tale? 

END