EXT. SUBURBAN TOWN-DAY
An ice cream truck is driving down the street and the truck is playing “The Entertainer” by Scott Joplin as it drives around looking for customers.
INT. BASEMENT-DAY
GABE (An overweight young man) is playing video games alone at home on hot summer day when he hears the ice cream truck song playing.
Gabe smells the ice cream and pauses his game.
GABE
Ice Cream Man?
Gabe jumps off the couch and runs upstairs.
EXT. SUBURBAN TOWN-DAY
The ice cream truck drives past Gabe’s house but Gabe spots the ice cream truck and starts to chase it. While Gabe is chasing the ice cream truck “The Entertainer” by Scott Joplin is playing in the background.
GABE
Ice Cream Man!
The ice cream truck driver named LARRY (a middle aged man) looks terrified seeing Gabe chasing behind him and drives faster.
GABE
Ice Cream Man!
Larry drives even faster to avoid Gabe only for Gabe to jump right in front of the ice cream truck. Gabe gets hit by the ice cream truck. Larry stops the truck after hitting Gabe.
Larry steps out of his ice cream truck and checks on Gabe.
LARRY
Dude, are you okay?
Gabe raises one finger and coughs blood.
GABE
One SpongeBob Popsicle please.
Larry heads back to the truck to look for the SpongeBob Popsicle only to have none.
LARRY
We’re all out.
Gabe grins and coughs a little. Larry looks scared.
GABE
Drumstick instead?
Larry goes back to his truck and grabs a drumstick. Larry places the drumstick next to Gabe.
LARRY
Ten dollars, please.
Gabe reaches into his pocket and pulls out a $20 bill.
GABE
All I have is $20. Can you give me change?
LARRY
Do you need me to take you to a hospital?
Gabe slowly gets up and picks up his drumstick. Larry looks shocked as Gabe hands Larry the $20.
GABE
Thank you.
Gabe limps back home and Larry sighs. Larry gets back into the ice cream truck. Larry backs out only to hit Gabe again.
LARRY
Damn it.
EXT. GRAVEYARD-DAY
Gabe’s funeral is happening and Larry is in attendance. Gabe’s mother is sobbing and after the funeral is over, Larry places a SpongeBob Popsicle on Gabe’s grave.
LARRY
Here ya go buddy, you’ve earned this.
Larry does the sign of the cross and leaves. A squirrel walks over and takes the SpongeBob Popsicle away from Gabe’s grave.
GABE (O.S.)
Damn it.
EXT. HEAVEN-DAY
Gabe now an angel looking down on Earth is sobbing. Another angel walks over to comfort Gabe.
ANGEL
You know Gabe. We have all the ice cream you can eat in heaven right here.
GABE
Even SpongeBob Popsicles?
ANGEL
Nah, except we don’t have those. We do have Spider-Man Popsicles though.
GABE
Damn it. This truly is hell.
HITLER (Based on his real life counterpart) walks in and Gabe is sobbing while the Angel stares at Hitler.
HITLER
Is it cool for me to come out?
ANGEL
Yeah Hitler, he figured out this is hell. Damn Viacom and their licensing fees!
END
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