Thursday, October 28, 2021

The Cast of “The Cool Fox Show” Character Biographies

Cool Fox is the show’s host and a cool guy. Cool Fox can get easily jealous of guests who are cooler than him. Cool Fox often is the voice of reason between the stupidity of the show’s head writer One Man Gang and the insanity of Tiny Batman. Cool Fox loves Chicago deep dish pizza and his favorite coming from famed pizzeria Lou Malnati'sHis dream guest for his show, one who he sends multiple invites to appear on his show to is Dolph Lundgren, but of course Mr. Lundgren always declines Cool Fox’s offer. Cool Fox overall is just a standard late night talk show host, that just so happens to be a talking cartoon toy fox.

 

Tiny Batman is Cool Fox’s talk show sidekick and a smaller much sillier version of the famed Caped Crusader from the comic books. Tiny Batman is bat-shit crazy and loves to say his name repeatedly.  Tiny Batman, like his bigger counterpart, is also a billionaire playboy, who only does the show because of his love to be on TV and because he’s bored when there’s no crime to fight. Tiny Batman has three bastard children with three different baby mamas who he never had relationships with. So, remember the moral of the story, don’t mess with Tiny Batman!

 

Head Writer One Man Gang is the head writer of “The Cool Fox Show”, Cool Fox’s second onscreen sidekick and a retired professional wrestler. The One Man Gang is the nephew of the show’s producer and he is later revealed to be the bastard son of Tiny Batman. One Man Gang is a fan of the work of Jim Henson and got to meet his idol on the show, much to the annoyance of his father Tiny Batman. One Man Gang is slow and not that bright, but he’s just a gentle giant who somehow has a great job and good friends.

 

Producer Ash Williams is the show’s producer and the one who manages the production money. Producer Ash is known for being a badass and for one of his hands literally being a chainsaw. Producer Ash is very intelligent and has a high IQ. Producer Ash is close to the owner of the network, Mr. Thing, and he is truly one who can rival Cool Fox’s coolness. Producer Ash may appear imposing and frighting, but honestly, he’s the most fearful one of all and just as scared as any normal person, maybe even more. Because Producer Ash must keep this ship from stinking no matter the cost and just be the best boss that he can to his loyal crew of dumb dumbs. 

 

Mr. Thing Kirby Grimm Esquire is a media mogul that owns the public access station that airs “The Cool Fox Show” and a retired superhero. Mr. Thing is a millionaire, yet he has gone bankrupt at least five times. Mr. Thing won this station in a poker game and his office happens to be above the studio where “The Cool Fox Show” is filmed. Mr. Thing isn’t very good with his fortune spending it on things like fancy art and even a pet rhinoceros named Buttercup. Mr. Thing is both still rich and always on the verge of bankruptcy. Since Mr. Thing has no children of his own, his entire fortune and media empire will probably go to his idiot nephew, retired space bounty hunter and current network intern, Bossk, who if, God help us all, gets the station, it’s game over!

 

Bossk is a retired bounty hunter from an alien planet and a current network intern who works on “The Cool Fox Show”. Bossk is also the nephew of Mr. Thing and the heir to his fortune. Bossk is very dumb and an alcoholic. Bossk has a very annoying voice and behaves like a literal child. Bossk isn’t even in college and the only reason he got the internship was because of good old nepotism. Bossk likes to get drunk at bars with Tiny Batman and he and Tiny Batman even have matching tattoos. Bossk claims to work on the side of the space mafia, while he’s really a space mob informant working for the space FBI to not go to prison planet. Bossk is half lizard and half human creature, and he claims that he’s from a planet called LizMars, his race is called Lizardechtos claiming he is a royal descendent of a great space lizard king and a being of pureblood on his home planet. It’s rumored he is not an alien prince, but his father being an average human who just screwed a Komodo Dragon in the Bronx Zoo during afterhours.  Bossk will one day own the station that airs “The Cool Fox Show”, it’s not a matter of if, it’s only a matter of when!

 

Señor Rey Fenix is a retired professional Mexican professional wrestler, a yoga teacher, an aspiring health guru and a network intern. Señor Rey Fenix is a go getter and dreams of bigger and better things. Señor Rey Fenix hates working at the bottom but is too clueless on how to work his way up to the top. Señor Rey Fenix recently got a promotion as assistant janitor to Captain Steve Caveman at the public access station. 

 

Uncle Roddy “Drunky” Piper is a retired professional wrestler, full time town drunk and occasional crew member on “The Cool Fox Show”. Uncle Roddy is a parttime cameraman on “The Cool Fox Show” and when he’s not, nobody knows where he is? Uncle Roddy is nobody’s uncle, but he’s called uncle because he’s the second oldest employee working at the station next to Captain Steve Caveman. Uncle Roddy rocks in both the bagpipes and an electric guitar for an AC/DC cover band. Uncle Roddy isn’t a friendly uncle, he’s the uncle you really don’t want to talk to very much.

 

Pirate Hunter Zoro is a college student, an ex-con, and a network intern. Pirate Hunter Zoro is very frighting individual along with saying “he’ll cut a bitch” as every other word. Zoro does various odd jobs both for the public access station and outside of the public access station. Why was Zoro hired in the first place? Desperation, really. Pirate Hunter Zoro is secretly the bastard son of Cool Fox, and he just wants his father’s love, even though Cool Fox has no idea that Zoro is his son. Pirate Hunter Zoro, while on parole, is giving a second chance at life by working for a public access station and “The Cool Fox Show”. But honestly, Zoro is more bark than bite.

 

Buttercup is the pet female rhinoceros who lives in Mr. Thing’s office. Buttercup loves straw and milk. Buttercup just dreams of going back home to Africa and for Mr. Thing to give her a belly rub every now and then.

 

Sir Powdered Toast Man is a retired superhero, a former radio DJ and a rival media mogul to Mr. Thing. Sir Powered Toast Man is very waspy and rich, and he wants to own it all. Sir Powered Toast Man is even more flaunting of his wealth than Mr. Thing with an even fancier office than his rival. Sir Powered Toast Man tries and fails to lure Cool Fox away from Mr. Thing’s station over to one of several of his. But Cool Fox has turned him down because he too has money issues at times and can rarely foot the bill. For now, Mr. Thing and Sir Powered Toast Man are on good terms and share content with each other. Sir Powered Toast Man wants to buy his rival out, but it’s just a waiting game for him.

 

Scuba Diver Dave is a writer of “The Cool Fox Show” along with his brother and he also hosts the show that’s on after “The Cool Fox Show”. Scuba Diver Dave is quite shy and afraid of clowns and women. Scuba Diver Dave is one of Cool Fox’s oldest friends and they knew each other before they got on TV. Scuba Diver Dave is a stand-up comedian and improv performer who performs regularly on the Chicago comedy scene. Scuba Diver Dave also has never been to the ocean despite wearing his trademark Scuba diving suit. Scuba Diver Dave is overall a pretty kind and caring yet very nerdy dude.

 

Sneezing Red Puppy is a red furred Basset Hound with either a bad cold or even worse allergies. Sneezing Red Puppy is Scuba Diver Dave’s comedic sidekick on his show and a fellow writer on “The Cool Fox Show”. Cool Fox has been friends with Sneezing Red Puppy since childhood. Sneezing Red Puppy is also a trained actor and improv performer who studied at The Second City in Chicago. Sneezing Red Puppy would take allergy medicine, but then he would lose he shtick so that’s why he doesn’t.

 

Mikey Whipwreck is a retired professional wrestler and a writing intern. Mikey is basically the love child of Woody Allen and “BobcatGoldthwait and he is an aspiring comedian. Mikey is the second comedic sidekick to Scuba Diver Dave on his talk show and he gives Scuba Diver Dave a run for his money on who’s the bigger dork. Mikey appears to have bipolar disorder or at least his mind alters his personality frequently due to years of chair shots to the head. Mikey is best friends with One Man Gang who Mikey treats almost like his little brother. Mikey is a people pleaser even though he’s quite shy around people. 

 

Tiny Hawkman is a new comedic sidekick of Scuba Diver Dave and a rival of Tiny Batman. Tiny Hawkman is a Christmas elf given to Scuba Diver Dave and his crew by Santa Claus when Mr. Claus was a guest on his show. Tiny Hawkman is less crazy than Tiny Batman but they both used to work in Santa’s Workshop. Tiny Hawkman is new at the game of comedy and public access.  He’s no match for Tiny Batman, but come on, who doesn’t love Tiny Hawkman!

 

Captain Steve Caveman is a former Saturday morning cartoon icon and current janitor and handyman. Captain Steve Caveman currently works at the public access station that airs “The Cool Fox Show” because he feels that it’ll help him find his way back to the big time. Captain Steve Caveman is jealous of his rival Quick Draw McGraw who also faded into obscurity after the 1970’s but yet still gets acting work at the local dinner theater. Captain Steve Caveman is war veteran and served in the Dinosaur Vietnam War before any of us were even born. Captain Steve Caveman is assisted in his job by Señor Rey Fenix who is useless which gives Captain Steve Caveman even more work to do around the station. Captain Steve Caveman applied for a writing job on “The Cool Fox Show” yet hasn’t heard back. For now, Captain Steve Caveman cleans the bathrooms and halls of the station quietly with pride as he sheds his fur for Señor Rey Fenix to clean up. 

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